Funny definitions – the real meanings of words

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Pro Rata:
In favour of rodents. – Joseph Leff

Probate:
(1) Close examine four pairs.
(2) Worms for professional fishermen. – Joseph Leff

Problematic:
A garret in need of repairs. – Joseph Leff

Proceeding:
Professional sowing. – Joseph Leff

Procrastinator:
Someone with a wait problem. – Joseph Leff

Procure:
A doctor’s job. – Joseph Leff

Produce:
In favour of Mussolini. – Joseph Leff

Products:
Air vents installed professionally. – Joseph Leff

Professor
A textbook wired for sound

Profile:
In favour of keeping records. – Joseph Leff

Profit:
A suit altered by an expert. – Joseph Leff

Profound:
We discovered an expert! – Joseph Leff

Profundity:
A professionally-written, silly little song. – Joseph Leff

Profusion:
Anti-fission. – Joseph Leff

Programme
Designed to Lose: A diet. – Joseph Leff

Programme:
Metric advocate. – Joseph Leff

Programmer:
In favour of literacy. – Joseph Leff

Prologue:
Advocate forest preservation. – Joseph Leff

Promise of Strong Support:
Vow wow. – Joseph Leff

Promote:
In favour of the ditch around the castle. – Joseph Leff

Promoter:
Advocate electrical engines. – Joseph Leff

Promotions:
Movements by an expert dancer. – Joseph Leff

Pronounce:
In favour of persons, places and things. – Joseph Leff

Pronouns:
People, places and things that get paid. – Joseph Leff

Propaganda
A well behaved and upper-class goose

Propertied:
Wearing an appropriate cravat. – Joseph Leff

Property:
A suitable Chinese beverage. – Joseph Leff

Propose:
Why a model gets paid. – Joseph Leff

Propound:
Opposed to the metric system. – Joseph Leff

Prose:
No amateurs. – Joseph Leff

Prosecute:
Attractive writing. – Joseph Leff

Prospecting for Gold:
A gilt trip. – Joseph Leff

Protestants:
(1) Object strongly to insects.
(2) Object to Mum’s sisters. – Joseph Leff

Prototype:
The expert will sit at the keyboard. – Joseph Leff

Protract:
In favour of real estate developments. – Joseph Leff

Provender:
An expert seller. – Joseph Leff

Proverbs:
In favour of action words – Joseph Leff

Province:
Vincent, the expert. – Joseph Leff

Provision:
An optometrist. – Joseph Leff

Provocation:
A professional career. – Joseph Leff

Prune
A plum that’s seen better days

Psychiatrist
Someone who doesn’t have to worry as long as other people do

Psychic
(1) Someone who charges medium prices.
(2) A two-part move in martial arts. – Joseph Leff

Psychopath
(1) Crazy road.
(2) The M25 during rush hour. – Joseph Leff

Psychotic:
An insane insect. – Joseph Leff

Public Hanging:
Found at an art gallery. – Joseph Leff

Public Speaker
Someone who believes in a wordy cause.

Public Speaking
The art of making deep noises from the chest sound like important messages from the brain.

Puddle
What you find on the pavement when it has been raining cats and dogs

Puff Adder:
Another cigarette. – Joseph Leff

Pull
What a dentist needs in order to be successful.

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P – Pages 1234567 8910111213