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What kind of tree does a math teacher climb?
Geometry !

What do you have to know to get top grades in geometry ?
All the angles !

What kind of pliers do you use in arithmetic?
Multipliers !

If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars
would you have?
One dollar.
You don't know your arithmetic.
You don't know my father !

Jackie stood quietly as her father examined her report card.
"What is this 45 in math?" asked her father.
"I think that's the size of the class," she said quickly!

If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left
?
I don't know.
Why not ?
In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.

If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what
would I have ?
Big hands !

The teacher was giving her pupils a quiz on counting. Jackie got things
started by counting from 1 to 10. "Now, Fred," said the teacher, "you
take over, beginning with 11."
"11, 14, 23, 42, 26," said Fred.
"What kind of counting is that'?" asked the teacher
"Who's counting'?" replied Fred. "I'm calling signals."

If you got $10 from 10 people, what would you have ?
A new bike !

Why was the maths book unhappy?
It had too many problems !
